Spanning from winter balls to Front Lawn football, California Baptist University offered community-building events that emphasized investing in important relationships. At times, this environment also encouraged the cultivation of romantic relationships on campus.
According to Anajlli Becharbhai in The Medium, 2022 polls and statistics revealed that 63% of college men sought long-term relationships and 83% of college women preferred the same.
These statistics, combined with social phrases such as “Ring by Spring” and “MRS degree,” confirmed that many incoming college students believed they would find their significant other during their college years. At CBU, many alumni and current students shared similar experiences.
Stephanie Rogers, a stay-at-home mom, wife and substitute teacher, grew up in Riverside five minutes from CBU. Since childhood, she maintained a strong connection to the university and wanted to live in a dorm on campus, even though she lived nearby.
Stephanie Rogers first met Mark Rogers when he visited her college group at Magnolia Church. He was a junior at CBU and she was an incoming freshman.
A year later, the Rogers trained to be Resident Advisers. They also served together in different campus activities, such as Night of Nations. In the early 2000s, Stephanie Rogers recalled that CBU was much smaller, which created a tight-knit community.
“The training together was much smaller then,” Stephanie Rogers said, “and so we had time having fun, getting to know each other in a group context.”
During the fall semester of Stephanie Rogers’ sophomore year, Mark Rogers won Mr. CBU, a student-voted election held in honor of a graduating senior. As part of the role, Mr. CBU attended the annual Yule Festival, a winter formal event. Mark Rogers asked Stephanie Rogers to be his date and she said yes.
“I knew that he didn’t just date people flippantly,” Stephanie Rogers said, “so it felt like a big deal.”
This past January, the couple celebrated 22 years of marriage. Although many traditions that brought Mark and Stephanie Rogers together have since been discontinued, CBU continued to host meaningful events that united the student body.
Hope Harris, senior psychology and Christian studies double major, met her boyfriend Fridrik Tiedemann during freshman orientation, the first day of her first week at CBU.
The two participated in study groups together. At first, they did not look for a relationship and avoided talking to each other. Eventually, they recognized each other’s passion for the Lord.
“Of course, that led into… talking about our testimonies… Then I was realizing that he was really solid,” Harris said. “He was [a] really sincere believer and pursuing his faith and very knowledgeable.”
After becoming friends, Harris and Tiedemann met several times a week to discuss sermons, eat lunch and study together.
“And then we wouldn’t study at all,” Harris said. “We would just talk for three hours… and then we would get lunch.”
On the last night of freshman year, Harris and Tiedemann met on the Smith and Simmons lawn to say goodbye. As they sat watching the sunset, Tiedemann confessed that he liked Harris and the two continued talking over the summer. Since then, they have dated for three years.
Reflecting on her experience, Harris advised students to “start off with good habits, really, really strong boundaries and habits of what you want and then learn from there.”
Whether someone’s love story had begun, was beginning or had not yet started, relationships still required ongoing learning and growth beyond college.
“As we change and grow, we keep learning each other, and learning and growing with each other… not apart, but together,” Stephanie Rogers said.
That process of learning began with the community and support available to students. Accountability partners and spiritual mentors served as important resources throughout CBU, helping students observe others and take wise steps toward serious relationships.
